Your buddy is complaining
about her long working hours.
You share that
you work longer hours.
Your sister is telling you
she has a terrible cold.
You tell her
you have a worse cold.
It is very human
to want
to one up
a loved one’s state.
You might think
it will make them feel like
their situation
isn’t that bad.
It clearly could be worse.
Resist the urge
to do this.
They came to you
wanting some sympathy,
wanting someone
to listen to them,
wanting some attention.
This one upping
shifts the attention
away from them
to you.
It shuts down
their complaining.
They might feel obliged
to try to comfort YOU
when they are truly the person
who needs comforting.
If a loved one
comes to you
looking for sympathy,
for love,
for attention,
give them that.
Don’t compete with them.