Crucial Skills has a great post
on how to deal with accusations.
A manager,
years ago,
taught me this trick with facing
an emotional accuser…
I automatically repeat what she says.
I’ll say something like…
‘From what I understand,
you feel I did this and this and this,
is that correct?’
This does a few things…
I can respond initially
without thinking (or feeling).
It puts cooling down time
between the accusation
and addressing the situation.
The accuser usually,
after venting,
calms down.
Often when the accuser hears her own words,
she realizes she’s not being rational.
It also reassures me
that I’m hearing her correctly.
The key to handling accusations
is to take emotion out of it.