April 2009 – Page 3

Pulling Vacation

One of my buddies had her vacation request denied.
It was approved a month ago,
she managed her workload,
she already arranged coverage,
yet the manager pulled it
for no clear reason.
(other than a power play)

So the tickets already purchased,
her family is going
but
my buddy is staying back.
She’s bitterly unhappy,
sending out resumes,
and arranging interviews
(because she’s good
and talented people are always in demand,
recession or not).
Her unhappiness is spreading to the entire team.

Don’t mess with vacations.
If something comes up,
work with your employee on this ’emergency.’
Let her figure out an alternative
(a responsible employee will).
It could be working remotely
or shifting some vacation
or working 24-7 before and after
or she could even come to
the decision to cancel herself.

But don’t be the one to make that decision.
If you do, you’ll lose your good employees
(anyone able to find another job).

Constant Complainers

A loved one of mine
complains constantly.
It doesn’t matter how wonderful something is,
she always finds a fault with it.
Complaining makes her happy.

That’s one reason
why large companies track complaints.
The payoff for constant complainers
is the complaint.
They like to be listened to.
They don’t need stuff or action to make them happy.
If you listen to their complaints,
they’ll happily (or in this case, unhappily) continue to buy
(only you can decide whether the sale is worth it).

How to tell if you’re dealing with
a constant complainer?

Again, tracking.
Many companies have a sliding scale
of freebies they give to unhappy customers.
First call may be a stack of coupons for free cartons of orange juice.
Second call may be one coupon for a free carton.
Third call may be a $1 off coupon.
Until eventually,
the caller receives only a written thank you for their complaint.
If they call back after that,
you have a constant complainer.

What to do with constant complainers,
these masters of negative word of mouth?

If you can go without their sales,
cut them off kindly.
Refer them to the competition
(double plus – one less complainer for you,
one more complainer for them).

If you need their sales,
listen.

Support Your Product’s Format

I recently read an interview
with an author
who clearly hated reading eBooks
and claimed they weren’t true books.
A strong and honest opinion.
The thing is…
her books are now only available
in eBook.

I once worked with a coworker
who very vocally felt that cola should be
only enjoyed out of glass bottles.
That despite
economics and consumer preferences
dictating that most cola was sold in cans and plastic.

I continue to hear grumblings from movie folks
about how HD DVD should have won
the format wars
and how Blu-ray is inferior.

Doubting the format
your product is now in
creates doubt in your customer’s mind.

Sure, go ahead and work on another format
but until customers are ready to switch,
don’t put down the one
they’re currently buying.

If you do,
you’ll end up looking
like a pretentious jackass.

Bathroom, Bus, And Bed

Struggling to find new ideas?

R. Keith Sawyer,
author of the book
Explaining Creativity: The Science of Human Innovation
says that
bathroom, bus,
and bed
are the three places most likely
to lead to a creative idea.

When I’m working on a novel,
I tend to sleep more.
I’ll think about a problem before bed
and then when I wake up,
I’ll often have a solution.
The quiet time allows my brain to work
uninterrupted.

If I’m stuck for ideas, period,
I take the bus.
There is something very inspiring
about being around
so many different people
from different walks of life.
Some are on their phones,
allowing me to listen in on
one-sided conversation,
forcing me to make up
the other half.
Others will be reading
the latest hot book.
Styles, color choices, music
are all out of my comfort zone.

I don’t see the bathroom as a creative place
but many of my friends do.
They’ll bring in reading material
including magazines and newspapers
and the quiet time allows them to think.

Try the three B’s
next time
you need to be creative.

A Bull Market For Leaders

In these challenging economic times,
mentorship in some companies
is viewed as a nice-to-do
that doesn’t need to be done.

Mistake.

Steve Krupp of Delta Organization & Leadership says
“If you just focus on short-term survival
and you alienate your key leaders,
they may stick it out
but they won’t forget.
The best and the brightest can always find jobs;
that particular subset will always have a bull market.”

Keep mentorship of your future leaders
as a priority.

Commissions Are NOT Costs

This week,
two of my buddies told me
their companies slashed commissions
as part of their cost cutting.

What the F**k?

Commissions are NOT costs.
Yes, on financial statements,
they are often lumped in with costs
but commissions are, in reality,
cost of goods sold.
They are incentives.
They’re the cost of selling something.

You WANT to pay more commissions
because that means you’re selling more.
If you need to motivate your sales team,
if you need to sell MORE,
(maybe because you’re battling a recession economy)
commission percentages should INCREASE,
not decrease.

While we’re talking sales ‘perks’,
selling achievement recognitions
such as President’s Clubs and
other top Seller incentives,
also pay for themselves.
Salespeople only get these if they sell.
To cut these would be the height of foolishness.

Employee Of The Year

Employee Of The Year
is a very powerful award
within a company.
It should not be given out lightly.

Why?

Because the choice sends
a strong, clear signal
to other employees,
to management,
to customers,
to vendors.

It says
‘this employee
has the characteristics we appreciate.”
If the employee of the year tows the company line,
you’ll build a company of yes men and women.
If the employee of the year is an innovator,
you’ll build a company of innovators.

Think about where you want your company to go
and THEN select an employee
embracing that direction.

When Your Manager Doesn’t Listen

There are two types of managers.
There are managers who listen
and managers who don’t.

Managers who don’t listen
will likely never listen.
It doesn’t matter how loud you are
or how long you talk
or how clever or right you are.
They aren’t going to listen.

The best way to deal with
a manager who doesn’t listen
is to get all her crazy requests in writing
(good to do for all managers),
keep your misgivings to yourself
and do whatever she asks you to do.

Don’t worry.
You won’t have to pull these nutbar moves for long.
Managers who don’t listen
tend to make big, big mistakes.
She’ll then have to quickly move
from that position of authority
(because none of her staff will save her a$$)
and soon she’ll be someone else’s problem.

Of course, if you’re managing people
and you’ve never changed a decision
based on employee insight,
you’re one of these dreaded managers.
That means
your employees are,
right now,
patiently waiting for you to f**k up
and get your a$$ fired.
Yes, you have good reason to be paranoid.

No April Fools

Yesterday, a loved one gets an invite
from his company’s social committee.
They’re organizing a tour of a few different industries
including a sewage treatment plant.
The loved one emails me,
excited,
because he knows this is my type of event.
I get excited too.
Who wouldn’t want to learn about different industries?
Who wouldn’t want to meet
prospective clients this company could station consultants at?

Turns out…
management wouldn’t.
This was an April Fool’s joke.

Another company sets up one-on-one meetings
with managers and human resources reps.
All employees are in a panic.
Lay offs are coming.
Resumes go out.
Calls to headhunters are made.

Ha ha!
Fooled you.
April fools!

At worst, an April Fools prank results in a lawsuit.
At best, you’re seen as a liar.
Neither benefit a career.

The Twitter Age Of Brevity

I’ve noticed a trend lately.
Emails from some coworkers
have gotten shorter.

From some.

I had a theory as to the cause
so I asked a few questions.

The common link?
They’re all on Twitter.

I’m not a crazy Twitter fan
(though I do use it).
It can be a time waster
and a lawsuit waiting to happen.

However, one benefit is
it forces people to communicate in 140 characters or less.
That cuts out B.S.,
posturing, useless information.

And that saves me time.